A for apple.

B for bada apple.

C for chhota apple.

D for dusra apple.

E for ek aur apple.

F for fokat ka apple.

G for gol apple.

H for hazar apple

I for itney saarey apple?

J for jaao nahi khaana hai apple

K for kaise nahi khaayengey apple

L for lena padhega tumko apple

M for mujhe nahi chahiye itne apple

N for naa nahi kehtey kyunkey yeh hai apple

O for Oh to tumne khaa daale yeh saare apple

P for peth bhar Ke khaao apple

Q for qismat mein nahi hoti hai sabke, yeh apple

R for roz agar khaao tum apple

S for sehetmand rahoge khaaogey agar tum apple

T for tumko nahi milengey itney achey apple

U for udhaar kii nahi hai yeh apple

V for very tasty hai yeh apple

W for waste na karo time aur khaalo jaldi se apple

X for X'mas mei bhii khane padenge apple

Y for youn na chehra phero dekhkey apple

Z for zaroor dil bhar gaya hoga khake itne saare apple

Note: This is not a nursery rhyme and should not be used as one too. This is just a time past article.

HE: I'm a photographer I've been looking for a face like yours!
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours

HE: May I have the pleasure of this dance?
SHE: No, I'd like to have some pleasure too !

HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
SHE: I must have been given your share !

HE: Will you come out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry! I'm having a headache this weekend !

HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out!
SHE: Okay, get out!

HE: I think I could make you very happy
SHE: Why? Are you leaving?

HE: What would you say if I asked u to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time!

HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: Why, don't you already have one?

HE: Shall we go and see a film?
SHE: I've already seen it!

HE: Do you think it was fate that brought us together?
SHE: Nah, it was plain bad luck !

HE: Where have you been all my life?
SHE: Hiding from you.

HE: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
SHE: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

HE: Is this seat empty?
SHE: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down .

HE: So, what do you do for a living?
SHE: I'm a female impersonator.

HE: Hey baby, what's your sign?
SHE: Do not enter.

SO BEWARE OF WHAT YOU ASK FOR !!!

Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new Chairman for Microsoft Europe. 5000 candidates assembled in a large room.

One candidate is Santa Singh an Indian (Punjabi) guy.

Bill Gates thanked all the candidates for coming and asking those who do not know JAVA program to leave. 2000 people leave the room. Santa says to himself, 'I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to lose if I stay. I'll give it a try'.

Bill Gates asked the candidates who never had experience of managing more than 100 people to leave. 2000 people leave the room. Santa says to himself ' I never managed anybody by myself but I have nothing to lose if I stay. What can happen to me?' So he stays.

Then Bill Gates asked candidates who do not have management diplomas to leave. 500 people leave the room. Santa says to himself, 'I left school at 15 but what have I got to lose?' So he stays in the room.

Lastly, Bill Gates asked the candidates who do not speak Serbo - Croat to leave. 498 people leave the room. Santa says to himself, ' I do not speak one word of Serbo - Croat but what do I have to lose?' So he stays and finds himself with one other candidate.

Everyone else has gone. Bill Gates joined them and said 'Apparently you are the only two candidates who speak Serbo - Croat, so I'd now like to hear you have a conversation together in that language.' Calmly, Santa turns to the other candidate and says

'Hor Phaphe ki haal chaal?.'

The other candidate answers

'O Vadiya veere, tu Sunna'

HIS

1. Pull up to ATM


2. Insert card


3. Enter PIN number and account


4. Take cash, card and receipt

HER

1. Pull up to ATM


2. Check makeup in rear view mirror


3. Shut off engine


4. Put keys in purse


5. Get out of car because you're too far from machine


6. Hunt for card in purse


7. Insert card


8. Hunt in purse for wrapper with PIN number written on it


9. Enter PIN number


10. Study instructions for at least 2 minutes.


11. Hit "cancel"


12. Re-enter correct PIN number


13. Check balance


14. Look for envelope


15. Look in purse for pen


16. Make out deposit slip


17. Endorse checks


18. Make deposit


19. Study instructions


20. Make cash withdrawal


21. Get in car


22. Check makeup


23. Look for keys


24. Start car


25. Check makeup


26. Start pulling away


27. STOP


28. Back up to machine


29. Get out of car


30. Take card and receipt


31. Get back in car


32. Put card in wallet


33. Put receipt in checkbook


34. Enter deposits and withdrawals in checkbook


35. Clear area in purse for wallet and checkbook


36. Check makeup


37. Put car in gear, reverse


38. Put car in drive


39. Drive away from machine


40. Travel 3 miles


41. Release parking brake

11 signs that ur in love

ELEVEN
You walk really slow when you're with them.

TEN:
You feel shy whenever they're around.

NINE:
You smile when you hear their voice.

EIGHT:
When you look at them, you can't see the other
people around you, you just see him/her.

SIX:
They're all you think about.

FIVE:
You realize you're always smiling when you're
looking at them.

FOUR:
You would do anything for them, just to see them.

THREE:
While reading this, there was one person on your
mind this whole time.

TWO:
You were so busy thinking about that person, you
didn't notice number seven was missing

ONE:
You just scrolled up to check & are now silently
laughing at yourself.

send this (link) to at lest 5 people in the next 10 min.

And something good will happen.
Because you read this you will get kissed on
Friday. BREAK IT and your crush will ask someone else out.

Tomorrow will be the best day of you life.

Note: I've deleted the rest of the unwanted text. Cheers.
So that you have the pleasure of just going through the email.

A married couple in their early 60s was celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.

Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table saying,

"For being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish."

"Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband," said the wife.

The fairy waved her magic wand and -- poof! Two tickets for the Queen Mary II appeared in her hands. The husband thought for a moment, and then said, "Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this will never come again.

I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me." The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish.

So the fairy waved her magic wand and -- poof!

The husband became 92 years old.

The moral of this story:

Men who are ungrateful b_____s should remember fairies are female....:-)

Have u ever heard about LPG cylinder's expire date. I also didn't know.

How to find LPG cylinder's expiry date?

Very important information. Do you know that there is an expiry date (physical life) for LPG cylinders?

Expired Cylinders are not safe for use and may cause accidents. In this regard please be cautious at the time of accepting any LPG cylinder from the vendor.

Here is how we can check the expiry of LPG cylinders:
On one of three side stems of the cylinder, the expiry date is coded alpha numerically as follows A or B or C or D and some two digit number following this e.g. D06.

The alphabets stand for quarters -

A for March (First Qtr)
B for June (Second Qtr)
C for Sept (Third Qtr)
D for December (Fourth Qtr)

The digits stand for the year till it is valid.
Hence D06 would mean December qtr of 2006.
Share this message with everyone you know. Your kind cooperation will save life of many people and create awareness among the public.

Please do not accept the cylinder if the date has already expired.

"A" stands for the first quarter ie January to March and
"07" stands for the year 2007.
A-07 indicates the expiry life of cylinder and not the GAS filled in it.
This cylinder should not be used and returned to the gas dealer.

Expired Cylinders are not safe for use and may cause accidents. It's Urgent information to share with our friends & relatives.

Thank you, Sarbesh for sharing this information.

When things go wrong,
When sadness fills your heart,
When tears flow in your eyes,



Just let me know...........
I want to be there for you,
BECAUSE

... .... . . . . .. .. .. . . . ... .... . . . . .. .. .. . . .
... .... . . . . .. .. .... .... . . . . .. .. .. . . .
... .... . . . . .. .. .. . . . ... .... . . . . .. .. .. . . .
... .... . . . . .. .. .... .... . . . . .. .. .. . . .


My cousin is selling Tissue Paper...
Buy 1, Get 1 Free!

An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the World. So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to China.

On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he Noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read "$10,000 per call". The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what The telephone was used for. The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God.

The American thanked the priest and went along his way.

Next stop was in Japan . There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the Same golden telephone with the same sign under it.

He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in China and He asked a nearby nun what its purpose was. She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 He Could talk to God.

"O.K., thank you," said the American.

He then traveled to Pakistan , Srilanka , Russia , Germany and France .

In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 Per call" sign under it. The American, upon leaving Vermont decided to travel to up to Nepal to See if Nepalese had the same phone.

He arrived in Nepal , and again, in the first church he entered, there was the same golden telephone, but this s time the sign under it read "One Rupee per call."

The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign. "Father, I've traveled all over World and I've seen this same golden Telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, But in rest of the world price was $10,000 per call.

Why is it so cheap here?"

Readers, it is your turn........ Think ....before you scroll down...

............ .........
............ ........ ........ ......... .......... ......... .

............ ......... .......... ......... ....

............ ............ ......... ........ ........ ......

............. ......... ........... ......... ........ ......

............ .......... .......... .......... ........ ......

............ .......... ........... ........... ........ ......

............. ......... ......... .......... .......... ......

............ ......... ........ ......... ......... ......

............ ........ ......... ......... ........ .......


............ ......... ......... ........ ......... ........

............ ......... ........ .......... ........ ......

.............. ........ ......... .......... ........ ......

............... .......... .......... ......... ........ ......

............. ............ .......... ........ ........ ......


The priest smiled and answered, "You're in Nepal now, Son - it's a Local Call". This is the only heaven on the Earth.

KEEP SMILING :)

Husband - hey dear, I am logged in.

Wife - would you like to have some snacks?
Husband - hard disk full.

Wife - have you brought the saree.
Husband - Bad command or file name.

Wife - but I told you about it in morning
Husband - erroneous syntax, aborts, retry, and cancel.

Wife - hae bhagwan! Forget it where's your salary.
Husband - file in use, read only, try after some time.

Wife - at least give me your credit card, I can do some shopping.
Husband - sharing violation, access denied.

Wife - I made a mistake in marrying you.
Husband - data type mismatch.

Wife - you are useless.
Husband - by default.

Wife - who was there with you in the car this morning?
Husband - system unstable press ctrl, alt, del to Reboot.

Wife - what is the relation between you & your Receptionist?
Husband - the only user with write permission.

Wife - what is my value in your life?
Husband - unknown virus detected.

Wife - do you love me or your computer?
Husband - Too many parameters.

Wife - I will go to my dad's house.
Husband - program performed illegal operation, it will Close.

Wife - I will leave you forever.
Husband - close all programs and log out for another User.

Wife - it is worthless talking to you.
Husband - shut down the computer.

Wife - I am going
Husband - Its now safe to turn off your computer

LAW OF QUEUE: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

**********

LAW OF TELEPHONE: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one.

**********

LAW OF MECHANICAL REPAIR : After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

**********

LAW OF THE WORKSHOP: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

**********

LAW OF THE ALIBI: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.

**********

BATH THEOREM: When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.

**********

LAW OF ENCOUNTERS: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

**********

LAW OF THE RESULT: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will!

**********

LAW OF BIOMECHANICS: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

**********

THEATRE RULE: People with the seats at the furthest from the aisle arrive last.

*********

LAW OF COFFEE: As soon as you sit down for a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

David Bissonette

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.

Sacha Guitry

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.

Anonymous

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?

Dumas

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.

Sigmund Freud

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."

Anonymous

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."

Sam Kinison

"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't."

James Holt McGavra

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.

Patrick Murra

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...

Nash

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.

Anonymous

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

Henny Youngman

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

Rodney Dangerfield

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

Anonymous

First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

Anonymous

1) Don't eat Kurkure because it contains high amount of Plastics.If you don't believe , just burn kurkure n see how it melts like the plastic. This was reported by The Times of India.

2) Avoid these tablets they are very dangerous

• D-cold


• Vicks action- 500


• Actified


• Coldarin


• Cosome


• Nice


• Nimulid


• Cetrizet-D

They contain Phenyl- Propanol -Amide PPA.Which Causes strokes, and these tablets are banned in U.S.

3) Cotton Ear Buds... (Must read it)

Please do not show sympathy to people selling buds on roadside or at Signals.....Just wanted to warn you all not to buy those packs of ear buds from the foot paths or Road side. It's made from the cotton that has already been used in hospitals. They take all the dirty, blood and pus filled cotton, wash it, bleach it and use it to make ear buds. So, unless you want to become the first person in the world to get Herpes Zoster Oticus (a viral infection of the inner, middle, and external ear) of the ear and that too from a cotton bud bought in chdeaper prices.
SO DON'T BUY THEM!

4) Don't eat Mentos before or after drinking Coke or Pepsi coz the person will die immediately as the mixture becomes Cyanide.. Please forward to whom u care.

5) Don't put your mobile closer to your ears until the recipient answers, because directly after dialing, the mobile phone would use it's maximum signaling power, which is equivalent to 2watts = 33dbi. Please Be Careful. Please use left ear while using mobile, because if you use the right ear, it may affect your brain directly. This is a true fact from Apollo medical team. Please forward to all your friends and relatives and create awareness.....

You Know You Are a Nepali When.....*

You think Mustang is the name of a place.

You look up when you hear an airplane.

You point with your lips or with your middle finger.

Whenever you meet someone you ask, 'Have you had your food?' ( bhat khayao?)

You meet someone in a movie hall and ask, ' Have you come to watch a movie?' (cinema herna ayeko?)

You call all action movies ' action pacck'

You meet an elder and he/she asks you, 'When did you come back?'

You know the three Ds of partying. i.e- dance, drink and dangdung (fist/khukuri fight).

You think all festivals mean relatives playing cards and getting drunk.

You cannot drink without chicken chilly and momos.

You think chicken chilly and momo are nepali food.

You are crossing a one way street and you have to check both sides. ( daya ani baya )

You get annoyed when people think you are from Naples.

Your relatives give you money whenever you visit them. ( even when you are 40)

When you see a pair of slippers upside down (ulta chappal) you have to turn it around.

You don't cut your nails at night. (alas the devil might take You and your family)

You feel you havent eaten if you havent had Bhath (rice).

You laugh at everything on Nepali TV but you still watch it.

You dont know that the buff you have been eating is actually short for buffalo.

You have been dragged to a mandir on saraswati puja so that you will get good grades.

You are not allowed to hum or sing while eating.

Your grandmum doesnt let you whislle at night.

You cant date someone if you are not in love.

You have a problem following rules and standing in line.

You call anyone rajesh hamal(famous Nepali Actor) if he has a long back-hair.

You wait for someone going 'tinaa-falaam-boraa-botttle' when you have loads of beer cans and bottles,

You watch Korean movie and try to act like one,

You miss those mountains you used to see the moment you opened your eyes in the morning..

You go out for lunch/ dinner/ whatever in a group and look at the menu for half an hour and order the following:

1. momo

2. chowmein

3. fried rice

4. chicken chilli

You think of titaura and your saliva glands go wild!!

You think Toyota Corrolla is the no.1 car in the world!

You can sing this song... 'super top, ma hun super top... ma luga lai seto paarchu...'

You miss mango tart, wai wai, rara and hatichap chappal..

You are good at drunk driving, especially on motorcycles...

-your conversation with any Nepali you just met always ends up being an interview to unearth the degree of association with this person. (eh...Ghar ka?? Lazimpat? Tyeso bhaye timile xyz lai chinchhau??)

- 90% of the time you end up knowing someone who knows someone who knows the person.

- The remaining 10% of the time the person is your relative.

- You owned a dog, or knew of a dog named Tiger.

- you think cats are evil.

- you feel obligated to pay for everyone else when eating out with your friends.

- you get a kick out revealing to some of your American friends that Kathmandu is actually a real place and not just a word invented to mean in the middle of nowhere (as in 'from Katmandu to Timbuktu')

- you didn't know Timbuktu was a real place in Mali, Africa.

- your American friends ask you if you have climbed mount Everest.

- you probably haven't even seen mount Everest.

- your favorite Hollywood actress used to be Phoebe Cates

- you pronounce Phoebe Cates as 'fobee cyats'

- You go crazy if you can't blow on your fingers after you touch your neck.Or who ever's 4. fingers that touches your neck. (Natra Gaand aunchha kya)

- You drive your friends crazy by touching their neck and running away before they can blow.

- You think you're better than Indians.

- you dislike India but can't live without their food and their movies.

- you pretend you can't speak Hindi.

- you think you don't have an indian accent.

- You are afraid to step on any paper, or pen (You don't want to piss off Saraswati and flunk an exam).

- you love the pungent, fermented smell of pickled bamboo shoots (tama) and dried and aged vegetable leaves (gundruk) + you are drooling at the thought right now.

- 'Babu' or 'Naani' is the default nickname for all male & female kids in the family since the last 10 generations.

Instructions: What you do is find out what each letter of your name means. Then connect all the meanings and it describes YOU. (Its TRUE!!) (Isn't it GREAT!!)

PS: If you have double or triple letters, just count the meaning once.

For Example: SUJATA

S - You are very broad-minded.

U - You feel like you have to equal up to people's standards.

J - Jealously

A - You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.

T - You have an attitude, a big one.

A - You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.

==========================================

A - You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.

B - You are always cautious when it comes to meeting new people.

C - You definitely have a partier side in you, don't be shy to show it.

D - You have trouble trusting people.

E - You are a very exciting person.

F - Everyone loves you.

G - You have excellent ways of viewing people.

H - You are not judgmental.

I - You are always smiling and making others smile.

J - Jealously

K - You like to try new things.

L - Love is something you deeply believe in.

M - Success comes easily to you.

N - You like to work, but you always want a break.

O - You are very open-minded.

P - You are very friendly and understanding.

Q - You are a hypocrite.

R - You are a social butterfly.

S - You are very broad-minded.

T - You have an attitude, a big one.

U - You feel like you have to equal up to people's standards.

V - You have a very good physique and looks.

W - You like your privacy.

X - You never let people tell you what to do.

Y - You cause a lot of trouble.

Z - You're always fighting with someone

This is my first blog of "All forwarded emails"