You Know You Are a Nepali When.....*
You think Mustang is the name of a place.
You look up when you hear an airplane.
You point with your lips or with your middle finger.
Whenever you meet someone you ask, 'Have you had your food?' ( bhat khayao?)
You meet someone in a movie hall and ask, ' Have you come to watch a movie?' (cinema herna ayeko?)
You call all action movies ' action pacck'
You meet an elder and he/she asks you, 'When did you come back?'
You know the three Ds of partying. i.e- dance, drink and dangdung (fist/khukuri fight).
You think all festivals mean relatives playing cards and getting drunk.
You cannot drink without chicken chilly and momos.
You think chicken chilly and momo are nepali food.
You are crossing a one way street and you have to check both sides. ( daya ani baya )
You get annoyed when people think you are from Naples.
Your relatives give you money whenever you visit them. ( even when you are 40)
When you see a pair of slippers upside down (ulta chappal) you have to turn it around.
You don't cut your nails at night. (alas the devil might take You and your family)
You feel you havent eaten if you havent had Bhath (rice).
You laugh at everything on Nepali TV but you still watch it.
You dont know that the buff you have been eating is actually short for buffalo.
You have been dragged to a mandir on saraswati puja so that you will get good grades.
You are not allowed to hum or sing while eating.
Your grandmum doesnt let you whislle at night.
You cant date someone if you are not in love.
You have a problem following rules and standing in line.
You call anyone rajesh hamal(famous Nepali Actor) if he has a long back-hair.
You wait for someone going 'tinaa-falaam-boraa-botttle' when you have loads of beer cans and bottles,
You watch Korean movie and try to act like one,
You miss those mountains you used to see the moment you opened your eyes in the morning..
You go out for lunch/ dinner/ whatever in a group and look at the menu for half an hour and order the following:
1. momo
2. chowmein
3. fried rice
4. chicken chilli
You think of titaura and your saliva glands go wild!!
You think Toyota Corrolla is the no.1 car in the world!
You can sing this song... 'super top, ma hun super top... ma luga lai seto paarchu...'
You miss mango tart, wai wai, rara and hatichap chappal..
You are good at drunk driving, especially on motorcycles...
-your conversation with any Nepali you just met always ends up being an interview to unearth the degree of association with this person. (eh...Ghar ka?? Lazimpat? Tyeso bhaye timile xyz lai chinchhau??)
- 90% of the time you end up knowing someone who knows someone who knows the person.
- The remaining 10% of the time the person is your relative.
- You owned a dog, or knew of a dog named Tiger.
- you think cats are evil.
- you feel obligated to pay for everyone else when eating out with your friends.
- you get a kick out revealing to some of your American friends that Kathmandu is actually a real place and not just a word invented to mean in the middle of nowhere (as in 'from Katmandu to Timbuktu')
- you didn't know Timbuktu was a real place in Mali, Africa.
- your American friends ask you if you have climbed mount Everest.
- you probably haven't even seen mount Everest.
- your favorite Hollywood actress used to be Phoebe Cates
- you pronounce Phoebe Cates as 'fobee cyats'
- You go crazy if you can't blow on your fingers after you touch your neck.Or who ever's 4. fingers that touches your neck. (Natra Gaand aunchha kya)
- You drive your friends crazy by touching their neck and running away before they can blow.
- You think you're better than Indians.
- you dislike India but can't live without their food and their movies.
- you pretend you can't speak Hindi.
- you think you don't have an indian accent.
- You are afraid to step on any paper, or pen (You don't want to piss off Saraswati and flunk an exam).
- you love the pungent, fermented smell of pickled bamboo shoots (tama) and dried and aged vegetable leaves (gundruk) + you are drooling at the thought right now.
- 'Babu' or 'Naani' is the default nickname for all male & female kids in the family since the last 10 generations.
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